A Tribute to Dustin . . .

Ah! The first post of what I hope will be many in a little tribute I've set up for my pal Dustin! Why for? you ask. Well, I feel there are times in all our lives when we find ourselves in tricky situations and it'd be so much easier to escape disaster if only we had the smarts of wiles of TV legend MacGyver.

It's a very simple premise, and to demonstrate, it'll go a little something like this:

INCIDENT 1-1
While leaving the church today for lunch, I found my right rear tire to be deflated. I changed the tire with the full sized spare from my trunk. Upon inspection of the deflated tire, I found the head of a nail sticking out of it. I took the damaged tire to Midtown Tire in Pella. They fixed it, and by the end of the day I had it back on my car.

If I'd been MacGyver . . .
The instant I saw the flat tire I would have knelt by the car and given a subtle grimace. I then would have sprinted back into the church and straight to the janitor's closet where I would have grabbed a jar of turtle wax and a bottle of drain cleaner.

Using a discarded butter dish from the church dumpster, I would have mixed these two ingredients together along with bird droppings I scraped from the car, and some used chewing gum I'd found under a park bench. Using an injection device I created from a ball point pen from the secretary's office, I would shoot the substance into tire's air intake with the help of an aersol can from the janitor's closet. The substance would patch the hole from the inside, while the aerosol reinflated the tire and popped the nail out.

I would then have taken the nail to the hardware store to discover that it was a nail from bin 88-2A. A hardware store employee would then tell me that nails just like that were just purchased by a man with a funny accent from the south side of town. Upon investigation, I would then find out the man was Russian, and he was building a warehouse to store atomic weapons that he was smuggling into our country for communists. He'd go to jail, and I'd go out to lunch with my good friend and boss Pete Thorton.

Till next time,
Mac